I hope that wherever you are, you know Recovery is with you right where you are.
The daily practice of the 12 Steps of Recovery often helps us find love within ourselves and in people who may not have received much love in their own lives. Perhaps our deep desire for love becomes our ability to both receive it and share it with others.
Those of us in Recovery often come to thank the difficult parent, demanding coach, or challenging teacher—but usually many years later. We may look back after ten, twenty, or even thirty years of Recovery and realize how much these people taught us. We seldom feel this way in the first stage of Recovery. Some of us have been deeply wounded by abuse or by growing up in an alcoholic home. For us, healing and growth can take more time.
This can place us in a creative tension, if we are willing to remain open to it. Both law and freedom are important for growth in Recovery. Yet, even though we are taught to hold this tension, few people in Recovery learn to hold it well.
We may find ourselves on bended knee before the 12 Steps, following every rule without question. At other times, we may angrily push back against them. Without a contemplative mind, we may not know how to live between these two places. We can be quick to judge and demand an ending before we have learned what a difficult experience or person has to teach us.
When I look back at my childhood and early adult years, I remember coaches and teachers who demanded discipline and accountability from me. I rebelled at times because I thought they were unreasonable in what they expected from me. Yet today, I look back on those years with great fondness. They taught me what it meant to be a good athlete and a good student.
The 12 Steps of Recovery are teaching me the same lessons about discipline and accountability. My wife, a friend, my spiritual director, and my support groups are part of my team. They help keep me grounded and accountable.
I believe God has placed these people in my life to support my desire for Recovery. They help me stay open, teachable, and willing to grow.
This is the wisdom of Recovery. We learn to hold both discipline and freedom, law and grace, with an open heart. We do not have to choose one or the other. In time, God can teach us how both can lead us toward healing, love, and a deeper life of Recovery.
Remember, Recovery is happening right now, in this moment.