February 23, 2024 Attitude of Silence

We live busy lives responding to all the stimuli around us. The child who needs a ride to basketball practice, a spouse who wants you to pick up their prescription at the pharmacy, the boss informing us of a new project assignment, preparing meals, and a host of other responsibilities we need to respond to.

Whether we are in Recovery or not living in silence can be an illusive endeavor. During the past week, I have taken at least 15 minutes each day to sit in silence and allow my heart to speak to me. The first few minutes I do well without distractions. Then as time rolls along my mind wants to take over. I begin to think about all the tasks I need to do for the day, I wonder how my daughters are doing, I hope my wife has a good day at work, and other thoughts distract me during my meditation time.

I have learned that distracting thoughts are normal and I don’t need to feel guilty or judge what is happening. When I become aware of distracting thoughts I need to return to the present moment and listen to the messages of my heart. Sometimes a day goes by and all I hear is my breath inhaling and exhaling. This is ok and perfectly normal.

I have had a few days where the message I am receiving is about relationships. I am curious if the reason relates to my recent hospitalization with pneumonia and sepsis (which I learned can be fatal if not detected early enough). Research on a mental health condition, addiction, and trauma stresses healing occurs during interpersonal relationships.

I have noticed a deeper connection (heart) with those I care about since my medical episode. Someone once said, “When I am creating things happen as opposed to when I am analyzing another person”. For me this means making a reconciliation with a person I have hurt, listening without judgment, and making a heart-to-heart connection with people in my life. This is not easy to do and we may fall short on certain days. To know if we are successful, ask ourselves, “Am I growing and living in joy?”

Peace

Larry

email: ljw@superhumanbeing

website: https://superhumanbeing.net

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