One of the features of my thinking has been tested in the last two weeks. I have not felt well for the better part of a month now. In the beginning, the Doctor diagnosed me with a sinus infection. I followed through with the treatment plan he gave me which took a better part of a week to rectify itself. 1 week later I began to experience chills, poor appetite, fever, night sweats, and cough. My doctor prescribed 5 days of doxycycline (antibiotic) to address the bacterial part of my illness.
5 days later I did not see any change in my condition. I called the Doctor to schedule a follow-up visit per her request because the antibiotic did not improve my physical condition. The Doctor examined me and said, “Your symptoms are similar to those of other patients I am seeing. It is a viral condition for which there is no medication to treat your symptoms”. However, I was prescribed medication to help manage my cough, she wants me to take both Tylenol and Ibuprofen to manage my fever, drink plenty of fluids, and rest.
My thinking around sickness has been quite shameful, unkind to myself, and without compassion toward my body. Here are some examples; “You just need to push through how you are feeling,” “You are just being lazy get off your butte,” “You need to pull your weight around the house” and “Keep exercising despite little to no energy”.
During this illness, I have changed the dialogue with myself. When one or more of the thoughts surface from above I say to myself, “Be compassionate with myself by taking time to heal” or “Be kind to myself and realize this is temporary and healing we eventually arrive” or “Follow the Doctors plan of recovery”
Does anyone experience something similar to this?
I work hard to become aware of my thoughts about circumstances that may not be helpful to my Recovery. When I identify this I turn showing myself self-compassion, self-kindness, and love.
Peace
Larry
email: ljw@superhumanbeing.net
website: https://superhumanbeing.net/