When we have a long-standing habit of self-judgment and we hold onto a particular story of ourselves it turns out to be negative of who we are. I find being kind to myself odd and anxiety-provoking.
Do we struggle with self-compassion? If I was in a classroom and the teacher asked this question my hand would rise sky high informing them of my struggle. In order to heal from my past events as a child when I was hurting, suffering, or in pain in some way, the adults in my life were struggling to cope with my mother’s mental health illness, and the physical abuse of my father. I did not receive the kindness and support I needed.
When I was addressing this issue with my therapist they said, “Imagine the you of today” giving the “younger you” the support it didn’t have at the time. If we experience distressing thoughts reach out to a therapist specializing in trauma to help rather than attempting to do it alone (although for mild situations we may do it alone).
When I traveled back in time with my therapist and found little Larry, I showed kindness and compassion to myself. I was told I could do whatever I wanted to as long as I was kind and supportive of myself.
We can’t change what has happened in the past, but it does not need to define us either. Our past has influenced how we think, feel, and act. The beauty of Recovery is we can learn new ways of interacting in the world and anchor ourselves to the present moment.
Peace
Larry
email: ljw@superhumanbeing.net
website: https://superhumanbeing.net/