Recovery has three layers:
- Experiencing sadness, anger, envy, frustration, irritation, ambivalence, and others due to changing circumstances in our lives.
- Finding out we have a mental health condition, addiction, and trauma.
- Mental and emotional needs require inpatient services or another living arrangement like a group home or adult foster home.
I have a changing life circumstance right now where I am experiencing sadness. Beginning in March my dad had issues with his knee. His condition began to cause a considerable amount of pain. He required a walker which zapped his energy due to the difficulty moving from one location to another. He fell several times which made safety an issue. One morning he was unable to get out of bed on his own. We called paramedics so he could be transferred to the emergency room.
By this time his pain was sky high. The Doctor ran tests and found a golf-sized baker’s cyst on the back of his knee. He was admitted to the hospital while they administered the medication to reduce the size of the cyst. Due to being immobilized for over two months, he lost most of his strength in the lower body. He was transferred to a rehabilitation center to help him regain his functioning.
Progress has been quite slow making it difficult for him to return home. I came to the conclusion he is unable to return home and may require assisted living. When I consulted with his treatment team they arrived at the same conclusion. I needed to inform Dad of the next step. I felt my stomach turning around inside, a lump in my throat, and sadness which made me shed tears. I was hoping he could return and we could return to the way things were before his physical injury.
My father is shedding tears as he faces the inevitable of moving into an assisted living home. Experiencing sadness is normal in a situation like this. I am aware I am going through the stages of grief; Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance.
Adding the second layer to the first layer intensifies my feelings and thoughts. What support do I need when this is happening? Yesterday I had a session with my therapist allowing me to face the feelings I am experiencing and serves as a reminder of how to stay on track. This evening I have a support group I will be attending. I know my peers will listen, show compassion, and be nonjudgemental.
I believe it is important to recognize the layers of our condition. I have people in my life ask me why the intensity of my feelings is more than theirs in the same circumstance. The reason is layer two is added to layer one whereby creating an emotional and mental charge that may get in the way of activities of daily living (cleaning, dressing, showering, preparing meals, socializing, laundry grocery shopping, etc.). This is a vulnerable moment for me. Thank you for allowing me to share it with you.
Due to the 4th of July Holiday, there will not be a blog on the 4th or 5th. There will be no support group on Thursday, July 4th. We will return on Thursday, July 11th from 6-7:00 p.m. Take time to connect with family and friends over this long weekend. These connections help our Recovery.
Superhuman Being
Peace
Larry
email: ljw@superhumanbeing.net
website: https://superhumanbeing.net/